


They Use the Word "Asset" Way Too Much

by parsnips (trifles)



Series: Tales of Love, Loss, and Insurance [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Gallows Humor, Gen, Humor, Insurance, Post-Movie(s)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-25
Updated: 2015-02-25
Packaged: 2018-03-15 01:17:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 138
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3432698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trifles/pseuds/parsnips
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It starts easily enough, with paperwork, and fine print.</p>
            </blockquote>





	They Use the Word "Asset" Way Too Much

**Author's Note:**

> You guys, I was studying for my health insurance licensing test, and I started writing _things_ on [tumblr](http://triflesandparsnips.tumblr.com/tagged/fic:insurance!bucky). Terrible _things_.
> 
> This is insurance-Bucky. These are his stories.

The Winter Soldier carefully reads over the requirements for Medicaid.

"Look, Steve, it says here that the applicant must be disabled, blind, or over the age of 65. I’m two of those at least. So are you."

"I— What?"

"You can’t shoot for shit, that has to count as blind." Then Bucky says, "Here we go: Some assets are not included in the asset limitation tests, such as the applicant’s primary residence, one vehicle, and wedding ring." He looks up at Steve. "Do you think if I went down to their offices, I could make a better argument for my arm being an asset, or for me being one?"

And then he makes his best dead-eyed-assassin face until Steve bodily removes the paperwork from him and they decide to just take Stark’s stupid group plan instead. The end.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [They Use the Word "Asset" Way Too Much](https://archiveofourown.org/works/3802717) by [parsnips (trifles)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/trifles/pseuds/parsnips)




End file.
